


"Bruce, they're lesbians."

by EthelPhantom



Series: Ethel's Maribat March 2020 [19]
Category: Batman - All Media Types, Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, But like non angsty, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Everyone Is Gay, F/F, Fluff, For like all of one scene, Humor, I honestly do not know how to meme or vine I'm just winging it, Improper use of memes, Maribat March, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Is in Denial, No Angst, Ridiculous, Vines, oh my god they were roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:20:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23310760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EthelPhantom/pseuds/EthelPhantom
Summary: Maribat March 2020, day 25: Roommates“Okay, so, I know you hate me and trust me, the feeling is entirely mutual, but we’re both trying to get an apartment in this damned city at the same time as a million other people and I’mso tiredof competing for the same ones as you so I think it’s time we joined forces.”
Relationships: Dick Grayson/Wally West, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Stephanie Brown & Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Ethel's Maribat March 2020 [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1650745
Comments: 31
Kudos: 384
Collections: Maribat March





	"Bruce, they're lesbians."

**Author's Note:**

> The Dick/Kori is a past relationship btw? I mostly just wanted Mar'i in the story so here we are. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

She was _so tired of this._ Like, not only did Marinette have to find a good apartment, but she also needed to fight over _all the same ones_ with this blonde young woman who was totally not cute at all or anything and it was so, so, so very annoying. 

After they had had their 17th fight over an apartment that they _also_ lost to other people, Marinette was finally ready to fling herself out of the window, or maybe she should defenestrate the blonde. Whatever it was, _one of them needed to go,_ thank you very much. 

So, she approached the woman, with either the intention to ally with her or to murder her — Marinette wasn’t too picky. Either would work.

“Okay, so, I know you hate me and trust me, the feeling is entirely mutual, but we’re both trying to get an apartment in this damned city at the same time as a million other people and I’m _so tired_ of competing for the same ones as you so I think it’s time we joined forces,” she said in one breath without even introducing herself and held her hand out. “So?”

The woman looked at her for a moment like Marinette had gone crazy. Then she seemed to actually consider her words, shrugged and grabbed her hand. “Sure. Name’s Stephanie. Stephanie Brown.”

Marinette grinned. “Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

|| ❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋ || 

It took them all of two weeks to find an apartment after their alliance was formed. Friendship. Whatever. This was pretty much precisely why she had thought it would be a good idea to ally herself with Steph. It definitely didn’t come with the benefit of staring at Steph’s cute butt or anything. No. Never. Absolutely not. It was not cute. It was annoying, just like Steph herself. Irritating and they distracted her from her work— no, she meant, they were always in the way and it was stupid. 

It also didn’t take more than two weeks before Marinette banned Stephanie from the kitchen completely.

There was a day when Marinette had finally managed to emerge from her room — it was the only room Steph and her ~~cute~~ butt didn't invite themselves into on a regular basis okay — as she was done designing for the day when Stephanie approached her with a smile Marinette recognised as the one that _immediately_ told her something had gone wrong and _badly._ Marinette found herself groaning through the anxiety she felt, not knowing what she had done.

“Sooo…. I think I might have broken the toaster,” she said, trying to make it sound like it wasn’t that bad. It was definitely that bad.

“...What makes you stay that?”

“It’s on fire.”

Was she serious? God damn it. Marinette hated her life at that moment so very much. Not even Steph could stop her from burying her face in her hands before running to the kitchen.

Indeed, the toaster was on fire though everything else still miraculously kept from setting ablaze. 

Both Steph and the toaster were covered in fire-fighting foam about five seconds later. Steph mostly because she was annoying, definitely not because she was smoking hot or anything.

There was a damn good reason Stephanie was no longer allowed to do anything other than taking pre-prepared food from the fridge and _maybe_ boil water in the electric kettle. Maybe. 

(That right got invoked when Steph was trying to boil way too little water in it.)

|| ❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋ ||

It didn’t take long after _that_ for her to meet Steph’s best friend, Tim. Yeah, _that_ Tim, the one that was way too young to be _a_ CEO, let alone _the_ CEO of the _Wayne Enterprises._ It wasn’t that Marinette thought him incompetent or anything, just that he was too young and should’ve still got to do the stuff a normal teenager did. _But,_ if he wanted to do it and enjoyed it, sure. 

Tim just stared at Stephanie lying on Marinette’s lap as Marinette typed away. He had taken the little girl of his brother, Mar’i, with him. The girl had wild, long, black hair and Marinette was rather certain Mar’i’s hair was moving on its own. She also had green eyes and even the whites of her eyes seemed to be green. Aaannd she was floating in the air. What even?

Well, Marinette wasn’t about to question the Wayne Family, they were allowed to have their own quirks.

“Aren't you two supposed to be sworn enemies?” he asked, arching a brow. Stephanie just scoffed and waved her hand around. 

“Get on with the times, Boy Idiot. This is my girlfriend. Obviously. She makes the best waffles.”

“Are you dating me for my waffles, Steph? That’s rude.”

“Anyone would date you for your waffles, Miss Roof Window.”

“One time, Steph! _One. Time._ ”

Stephanie burst into laughter.

As Mar’i ran around the apartment, Tim made his way to them and sat on the floor. “I wasn’t aware you liked girls, Steph.”

Stephanie just shrugged. “Oh well. I am lesbian.”

Mar’i stopped, turned around and tilted her head. “Lesbian? But I thought you were American.”

Three pairs of eyes turned to look at her. Tim’s mouth fell open. Stephanie reached to him, put a finger under his chin and closed it, even as she was staring at Mar’i like the girl was a ghost or something. Then they burst into a bout of uncontrolled laughter.

“Soo… I totally wasn’t expecting that.”

|| ❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋❋ || 

Bruce was staring at his third son’s best friend and her… friend? that said son had dragged with him over to the Manor for Thanksgiving because apparently neither had any family around anymore they could spend it with. The beginning of the celebration had been weird; His children had reacted oddly when Tim introduced the two of them. 

(“This here is Marinette, and you already obviously know Steph. They were fighting over apartments and then they made up and began searching for an apartment together. Now they live together,” Tim said, motioning at the two girls. Marinette waved a little, partly hiding behind Stephanie.

Cassandra nodded solemnly. “And they were roommates,” she stated, much to everyone’s surprise. Bruce had no idea why it was as surprising as his kids made it out to seem. She was right, they were roommates if they lived together, right?

“Oh my _god they were roommates!”_ Jason gasped, slamming a hand over his heart. Dick snickered, as did Stephanie. Marinette seemed to laugh a little at it, and that turned out to be enough to break the ice between them. Certainly, there was a story behind it because they couldn’t have those ‘inside jokes’ his children had told him about some time ago just yet, they had just met each other, but Bruce did not know what it could have been.)

Marinette had been very polite from the beginning, she brought a bunch of pastries with her she had apparently made all by herself (“Well, it’s not like Steph here is going to be of any help, not when she can set the toaster on fire”), and all of the family seemed to adore her already. She had even made vegan versions of her pastries for Damian. 

...She also looked a _lot_ like a Wayne. Dick had already joked that he was going to adopt her into the family if Bruce did not, though obviously as she was an adult already, the adoption would most likely be very informal and not official.

Would he, really?

He was woken from his thoughts by Dick clapping him on the shoulder, both knowing it looked ridiculous as his first son was shorter than him. 

“Aren’t they adorable?” Dick asked sighing, leaning against Bruce. 

“...Yes, they are very… adorable,” Bruce replied. “They do seem to be wonderful friends.”

He wasn’t expecting the burst of (confused) laughter that erupted from Dick at his words. “Oh my god. You think they’re just friends, Bruce? Harold, they’re _lesbians._ You know, in a romantic relationship? Just like Wally and I?”

He did not know his oldest son was in a relationship with Wallace West.

Bruce officially did not know how to compute anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> How did you like this?
> 
> You can also find me on my [tumblr](https://ethelphantom.tumblr.com/) if you want to scream at me about DC, Maribat or Code Geass! 
> 
> I can also be found on my art instagram [here](https://www.instagram.com/daicrimeth/?hl=en), so yelling at me there is also ok


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